Some years ago when my step-son was younger, the pastor of the youth ministry where we were members called him a backslider. He called him a backslider because he gave his life to God (got saved), and not long after he started back doing all the things he had always done.
I was very disappointed with the minister for labeling him the way he did. I think that we all need to get truth for ourselves so no one can /label/ with an untruth. From the understanding that I have got from the word of God, you would have had to walk with God and experienced all the power that He experienced, then if you turned from the faith, you were called a backslider. The bible says in Hebrews 6:4-6...
It is impossible for those who have once been enlightened, who have tasted the heavenly gift, who have shared in the holy spitit, who have tasted the goodness of the word of God and the power of the coming age, if they fall away, to be brought back to repentance, because of their loss they are crucifying the son of God all over again and subjecting him to public disgrace.
In my opinion, fear and making a person feel guilty, is being used in the church a lot to try to keep people from sin, but in the end /their wants/ is going to over ride /their fears/. We see it all the time, people get saved and try to stop doing the things they like doing, but they go right back. Then we put a label on them to make them feel bad, at this point some give up and wont try to live for God, wont try to live right for themselves or others. Some of us use guilt and fear a lot with our children, then when they get older they wonder why they are so fearful.
My step-son was only 15, he had a lot of anger in him and was very rebellious. I understood his feeling very well, because I grew up angry and rebellious too. So I knew from my own personal experience, that fear was not the answer, it has it's place, but this was not it. I never said anything to the minister, because I didn't feel that it would make a difference. I just told my step-son that he was not a backslider, that God loves him, and that God would be with him always. That is why God tells us to love each other /unconditionally/, that is the love that God has for us His children.
That was 16 years ago, my step-son /had/ to experience a lot of difficult things for him to get to a place where he ask God for his help. A place where he understood that he was not able to turn his life around, in his own power. That's the beauty of suffering, for some, if you suffer long enough you can get to a place where you don't want to do anything that will cause you to suffer.
Fear has it's place as I have said, but experience is our best teacher, it's like when you tell your child, "don't touch that hot stove, you will get burned," the child wont understand what it means to get burned until they feel the pain of being burned. We may get burned time and time again, but each time we do, you will do everything you can to not get burned again. It's the same with life, when I was an angry, rebellious child, and later became an angry adult, after many years of suffering, I got to a place where I didn't wont any part of that life.
The bible tells us to "count it all joy when we encounter difficulites," and it tells us why. As a parent I never wanted to see my child suffer, but I came to realize that he would never be the person that he or I am today if we had not experienced all the things that we have experienced.