Letters to Jesus (Ego, False-self, and Groundhog Day -7
So long as I am open and disposed to accepting You in my life; as long as I pursue You, no matter how many times or how hard I fall – You cannot forsake me.This is yet another consolation, a hug from You in the same vein as St. Therese of Liseux’s: “I know I am far from practicing what I should, but the mere desire to do so gives me peace.”
Your arm is around me constantly even when I fail to cast out the speck in my own eye. I would have it so, but cynicism, anger and criticism keep me dwelling on the faults of others rather than ridding myself of the very same faults. Daily accepting and pursuing You in my life is really the only peace and consolation there is, but it carries heavy consequences. How can one keep brushing Yourarm away? How can one keep avoiding Your hug and still seek You? Yet this is often the case with me, for my “self” is still so strong and the inner peace and quiet which comes now and then in flashes, more often eludes me.
We must never stop trying to grow into the person You made us to become, but so often we are not clear about that person. It is said that this blurring of Your image in us is a result of our fall. We kick against our banishment and exile to this exterior world often without any clear idea about what’s going on within us. Occasionally, in such times of unreasoned purity of heart we touch the inner world of who we really are and we understand that You will never forsake us. Seeking You in this life is a matter of constantly practicing and growing in entering into and dwelling in this inner world.