My wife and I often have lunch or dinner with a couple who are very dear friends. The husband of this twosome, wherever we’re eating, likes to bless himself and say grace before the meal with those with whom he will share it. This small, but easily recognizable action tweaks my sense of shame at feeling even the least bit uncomfortable and for not actively pursuing more public ways to bear witness to You.
On the one hand is a belief that a person’s whole life bears or does not bear witness to You. This, of course, may be something of a rationalization designed to minimize my guilt over a lack of overt displays; nonetheless, in the end, I do have a conviction that overt displays of witness or not, it is the way a person lives that bears the best witness - perhaps without any display at all.
On the other hand, Your example bore witness to the Father and the Truth with many overt acts of witness right up to the most overt act of love and witness in history. Can it be different for one who follows You? Should I be ashamed of showing by my actions what I believe in? This, then, becomes clouded by the issue of humility. Am I to make sure that overt acts of witness become seen by others? One thinks of the Pharisee in the front row of the temple making show of his devotion - there is no witness here, only the proud assertion of self in a theatric display of ego.
Anthony DeMello’s concept of an awareness of the reality of life in one’s self is germane here: a losing of all of one’s self in the reality of Your love. If, in doing this, something somehow shines outward, and others see it - so be it! But for its shining out to be an object for others to see, it becomes the reverse of bearing witness to You. ‘Tis a quandary, but not a totally unanswerable one: do what you will with selfless love and let actions stand with conviction - witnessed or not witnessed - with holy indifference.