I coded in that hospital twice. They had me at the nurses station and I had a nurse sit next to my bed for 24 hours at a time, unless Frank or Heidi (my sister) were there. One day Frank was there sitting with me, again I didn't know, he told me all the bells and whistles went off and (I had coded) about 16 people rushed into my room with their carts. They didn't even know he was there. He said he stepped back and was like a "fly on the wall". They had me ready, marked for a shot in my heart, paddles at the ready too. They were asking me if I had any trouble with heart palpation? I cold hear I was talking to them (I think). Then I heard them talk about options (I found out later that my heart was beating over 188 beats a minute). I was crashing. They mentioned the paddles, I thought no, I bet that will hurt! Then one of them said, "let's give her the shot first and if that doesn't work we will use ----. I could feel the needle in my arm. They waited, the room was totally quiet, then I heard I was stabilizing and my rhythm was going back to normal. Frank told me later that He knew he was invisible to everyone in the room. No one saw him. That seemed to amaze him. He told me he said "Lord, Please don't make me watch this woman die." He told me later that after I stabilized, everyone quietly walked out of the room. I had no idea at the time that I almost died. I was unconscious, but at times I could hear.
At another time, I seemed stable. My sister decided to make the trip home and back with some of my personal items and would be back ( she told the nurses this). She left and when she was about halfway home she got a call on her cell. The hospital told her that she had better come back, I had a relapse and was now on a ventilator in order to breath - it didn't look good. She raced back, and called everyone who needed to be called. While waiting she was anticipating my death and trying to remember what I wanted for my funeral, who in the family would take which animals into their homes and more. She told me she remember that I wanted to be cremated and my ashes spread in the hills around me.
Heidi was at my bedside and heard me talking to my Dad (who had died a couple of years before). I remember sitting on the floor of this big open space, I felt tired, worn out with no energy left in me. I was slumped and my head hung, my legs crossed. There was a light coming from across the room, it seemed like a distance away. I was not afraid just looking forward into the light. It was not a bright light, it was showing from somewhere distant. I was looking down at myself from above, on the floor and I could see my Dad walking towards me from behind. He got right behind me, put his hands under both of my arms and began to lift me up to a standing position. I told him Dad you are dead, what are you doing here? I didn't really know where I was. He told me "Linda, you are a strong woman, and it's not time for you to die yet, you have a lot to do still before it is your time to die. You have to go back. God has more work for you." That's all I remember. I don't remember coming back I don't remember any more conversation. I don't remember the space of time in between when my strength was coming back in a miraculous way.
I believe I was so tired I felt like I could not go on with life. But God gave me more energy bodily and spiritually, so we (He and I) could battle until We won the fight. He pulled me out and up towards the victory.
Still more to conquer ahead, but God was my Rock. Psalm 18:31-39 Praise God!