This thread is just for fun.


My husband and I met when I was a sophmore and he was junior in highschool, a million years ago. By age 16, to my father's dismay and my girlfriends' envy, I was wearing an engagement ring. My father would not even let me get my ears pierced, but one day I came home from school with an engagement ring on my finger--imagine! The ring was rather (clear my throat) cheap as far as engagement rings go, and has since broken and been replaced with yet another cheap ring, hehehe, but both rings were/are a symbol of a deep commitment to love, honor, and cherish. (Notice I did not say "obey.")


Anyway, at 17 I wrote our personal wedding vows. (But, my mean old dad made us wait the longest year of our lives till I was 18 to marry.) I was and am a romantic at heart and no common words would ever do at my wedding. The wedding itself was . . . umm, very small (a dozen people, including bride and groom) . . . and also rather cheap, or should I say modest? Yes, modest. Mom and dad didn't have a lot of money for a big fancy wedding and I didn't really care; it was young love and all we could see were the stars in our eyes.


The pianist at my wedding was the 14 year old best friend of my hubby's sister. She offered up a well intentioned rendition of the wedding march and when my ill-at-ease father and I were only half-way down the aisle, she suddenly stopped playing. The very small crowd was silent. Disconcerted, my dad and I stopped, too. Just stopped and stood there, frozen in a timeless moment, dad and I, in the middle of the chapel. I locked eyes with my young pianist. My eyebrows raised in silent question, her jaw dropped down and her hand flew up to cover her open mouth, and then she frantically resumed playing another round of the familiar tune, freeing my dear dad to escort me the rest of the way to the front.


My husband wore a cheap (or should I say economical) suit, and I wore my homecoming dress. (At homecoming my hubby had worn a tuxedo, but vowed never to wear one again, and never has.) In an effort to be beautiful for my wedding, I had sunbathed the greater part of the previous day and was a cheery shade of fire-engine red. I looked very much as the kids today say . . . HOT!


Being the romantic that I was (and am) I forbid the befuddled pastor to use the words, "till death do us part" in our service. He tried valiantly to convince me there is a good reason to include such words, but I wouldn't have it, and my husband was just an innocent bystander. It's true that at 18 years of age, one thinks one will never, ever die. So now, for better or worse, we are married, one to the other-- FOREVER. Thirty years have gone by and we're still a long way from forever. Despite many heated marital battles in our early years, we both survived the war, and have since settled into middle-age bliss. So, forever is a possibility.


Our wedding photographer was my husband's best friend. He didn't believe in those beautiful, dramatic action shots, so he simply waited until after the wedding, lined us all up like ducks in a row and clicked off a few mug shots of everyone. My mom's eyes were closed in almost every picture, my dad looked embarrassed, and the bride and groom looked ridiculously young. But at least I looked HOT. And inebriated, in my own opinion, but I swear I wasn't.


The thing I realize now is that I was extremely idealistic, despite my humble wedding. Ours was going to be the perfect marriage, and my husband was going to be the perfect husband. And I do mean perfect. Reading the vows I wrote (and I will share them with you) I have come to realize that I was expecting an awful lot of my bridegroom. I did not intentionally put such impossible expectation on him; I just wrote from my heart and it happened. You'll see what I mean very soon, but first, I'd like you to understand that I was raised in a very nonreligious family. We never talked about God, my mother was quite cynical of religion, and the day my dad begrudgingly gave me up was the first time I'd ever set foot in a church.


(Well, actually my parents dropped me off at Sunday School once when I was little--free babysitting, I think--but it didn't go at all well, because when they tried to abandon me there, I was most upset at their betrayal and I swung my little purse up in the air with all my might, hitting my unsuspecting father square in the nose, at which point he reflexively exclaimed three of the worst words you can think of to shout out in church. That was the beginning and end of my religious training.)


Back to my wedding vows . . . I will now share the words of that long ago young girl that once I was, and I think you may be amazed at my words. (Now, remember, I knew nothing of God.)


My love for you seems timeless. You were there before my first breath of life, before my eyes beheld the coldness of a discontent world. You were my hopes, my dreams, my prayers. I knew of you before my eyes first looked upon you. My mind knew of your love before you ever touched me. For you were there, even then, watching over me and protecting me.


LOL, do you hear? There I was, describing my poor husband as, well, umm . . . kind of eternal, omnipotent, omnipresent. I'll say this . . . I somehow knew exactly the love I needed!


When first I heard your voice, when my eyes first looked upon you, I did not yet know that love had found me. But time showed me that you were familiar, and now we may love as the spirits of our being have eternally.


I laugh now, because it seems I really expected my poor husband to be God. I had very high expectations. It goes on, all quite sweet, all hearts and roses . . . And then there's this:


The mountain stands against the sky,
Protecting the valley--shielding it from harm.
And so you stand over me,
Shielding me,
Loving me and holding me within the strength of your arms,
Not unlike the strength of the cliffs and peaks themselves,
Powerful against the sky.


Ahh, yes, my bridegroom, the Rock.


You are as steadfast as the mountain itself,
Never changing.
Your inner core remains as unrelenting as the depths of rock and stone.
Never will you change,
And I know your love will never diminish.


The unchangable Rock of my salvation!


And I am the valley;
I am aware of your presence night and day.
Protected from winds I am still,
Content in my position,
Looking ever upward to find you there.


Well, I must admit, my husband is taller than me.


And yet, for all your strength and all my calm,
We are inseparable.
There could be no valley without the mountain.
We are two individuals creating the scene.
One without the other would no longer be complete.
We shall stand together,
Always (FOREVER) side by side . . .
Nothing shall part us for love is our strength.


Well . . . looking back my wedding was certainly not the royal wedding. And eventually I figured out my husband was only human, not God . . . It took me awhile to forgive him for this slight flaw, but I eventually accepted and loved him despite his shortcoming, LOL. We had our ups and downs, our times of extreme intimacy and our times of withdrawl from one another. Heck, we even had a TEENAGER! But here we still are, just starting to grey around the edges, just starting to fatten up around the mid-section. What really became the sure adhesive in our marriage ( besides the chocolate he faithfully supplies me with) was when I met and fell in love with another man.


Don't worry-- my husband encouraged the relationship. The other man was Jesus; a good part of any marriage--and the bridegroom I longed for. You know-- the omnipresent Rock of my Salvation?


I've heard it said that the search for God is an instinct we are born with. When I see the vows I wrote so long ago, and hear the longing for divine love found within a young girl's words . . . I can only think it must be true. I longed for God, and somehow knew the perfection of His love before I ever met Him.


And as for my husband? Well, he ain't perfect, but then he eventually pointed out that neither am I, so we're well suited to one another. Jesus said there is no marriage in heaven. But my husband and I signed on for FOREVER, so God will need to work something out. After all, a promise is a promise.


At least I know the next wedding feast will be fantastic! And the next bridegroom?


Divine.

[Gideon]

Nancy! For fun??? Heck, i am in tears here. That is amazingly beautiful...and prophetic. You are truly a blessed woman and may I add, you husband is one lucky fellow. You have a great heart, dear Nancy. GREAT post!

Bruce

Originally Posted by Redeemed

This thread is just for fun.


My husband and I met when I was a sophmore and he was junior in highschool, a million years ago. By age 16, to my father's dismay and my girlfriends' envy, I was wearing an engagement ring. My father would not even let me get my ears pierced, but one day I came home from school with an engagement ring on my finger--imagine! The ring was rather (clear my throat) cheap as far as engagement rings go, and has since broken and been replaced with yet another cheap ring, hehehe, but both rings were/are a symbol of a deep commitment to love, honor, and cherish. (Notice I did not say "obey.")


Anyway, at 17 I wrote our personal wedding vows. (But, my mean old dad made us wait the longest year of our lives till I was 18 to marry.) I was and am a romantic at heart and no common words would ever do at my wedding. The wedding itself was . . . umm, very small (a dozen people, including bride and groom) . . . and also rather cheap, or should I say modest? Yes, modest. Mom and dad didn't have a lot of money for a big fancy wedding and I didn't really care; it was young love and all we could see were the stars in our eyes.


The pianist at my wedding was the 14 year old best friend of my hubby's sister. She offered up a well intentioned rendition of the wedding march and when my ill-at-ease father and I were only half-way down the aisle, she suddenly stopped playing. The very small crowd was silent. Disconcerted, my dad and I stopped, too. Just stopped and stood there, frozen in a timeless moment, dad and I, in the middle of the chapel. I locked eyes with my young pianist. My eyebrows raised in silent question, her jaw dropped down and her hand flew up to cover her open mouth, and then she frantically resumed playing another round of the familiar tune, freeing my dear dad to escort me the rest of the way to the front.


My husband wore a cheap (or should I say economical) suit, and I wore my homecoming dress. (At homecoming my hubby had worn a tuxedo, but vowed never to wear one again, and never has.) In an effort to be beautiful for my wedding, I had sunbathed the greater part of the previous day and was a cheery shade of fire-engine red. I looked very much as the kids today say . . . HOT!


Being the romantic that I was (and am) I forbid the befuddled pastor to use the words, "till death do us part" in our service. He tried valiantly to convince me there is a good reason to include such words, but I wouldn't have it, and my husband was just an innocent bystander. It's true that at 18 years of age, one thinks one will never, ever die. So now, for better or worse, we are married, one to the other-- FOREVER. Thirty years have gone by and we're still a long way from forever. Despite many heated marital battles in our early years, we both survived the war, and have since settled into middle-age bliss. So, forever is a possibility.


Our wedding photographer was my husband's best friend. He didn't believe in those beautiful, dramatic action shots, so he simply waited until after the wedding, lined us all up like ducks in a row and clicked off a few mug shots of everyone. My mom's eyes were closed in almost every picture, my dad looked embarrassed, and the bride and groom looked ridiculously young. But at least I looked HOT. And inebriated, in my own opinion, but I swear I wasn't.


The thing I realize now is that I was extremely idealistic, despite my humble wedding. Ours was going to be the perfect marriage, and my husband was going to be the perfect husband. And I do mean perfect. Reading the vows I wrote (and I will share them with you) I have come to realize that I was expecting an awful lot of my bridegroom. I did not intentionally put such impossible expectation on him; I just wrote from my heart and it happened. You'll see what I mean very soon, but first, I'd like you to understand that I was raised in a very nonreligious family. We never talked about God, my mother was quite cynical of religion, and the day my dad begrudgingly gave me up was the first time I'd ever set foot in a church.


(Well, actually my parents dropped me off at Sunday School once when I was little--free babysitting, I think--but it didn't go at all well, because when they tried to abandon me there, I was most upset at their betrayal and I swung my little purse up in the air with all my might, hitting my unsuspecting father square in the nose, at which point he reflexively exclaimed three of the worst words you can think of to shout out in church. That was the beginning and end of my religious training.)


Back to my wedding vows . . . I will now share the words of that long ago young girl that once I was, and I think you may be amazed at my words. (Now, remember, I knew nothing of God.)


My love for you seems timeless. You were there before my first breath of life, before my eyes beheld the coldness of a discontent world. You were my hopes, my dreams, my prayers. I knew of you before my eyes first looked upon you. My mind knew of your love before you ever touched me. For you were there, even then, watching over me and protecting me.


LOL, do you hear? There I was, describing my poor husband as, well, umm . . . kind of eternal, omnipotent, omnipresent. I'll say this . . . I somehow knew exactly the love I needed!


When first I heard your voice, when my eyes first looked upon you, I did not yet know that love had found me. But time showed me that you were familiar, and now we may love as the spirits of our being have eternally.


I laugh now, because it seems I really expected my poor husband to be God. I had very high expectations. It goes on, all quite sweet, all hearts and roses . . . And then there's this:


The mountain stands against the sky,
Protecting the valley--shielding it from harm.
And so you stand over me,
Shielding me,
Loving me and holding me within the strength of your arms,
Not unlike the strength of the cliffs and peaks themselves,
Powerful against the sky.


Ahh, yes, my bridegroom, the Rock.


You are as steadfast as the mountain itself,
Never changing.
Your inner core remains as unrelenting as the depths of rock and stone.
Never will you change,
And I know your love will never diminish.


The unchangable Rock of my salvation!


And I am the valley;
I am aware of your presence night and day.
Protected from winds I am still,
Content in my position,
Looking ever upward to find you there.


Well, I must admit, my husband is taller than me.


And yet, for all your strength and all my calm,
We are inseparable.
There could be no valley without the mountain.
We are two individuals creating the scene.
One without the other would no longer be complete.
We shall stand together,
Always (FOREVER) side by side . . .
Nothing shall part us for love is our strength.


Well . . . looking back my wedding was certainly not the royal wedding. And eventually I figured out my husband was only human, not God . . . It took me awhile to forgive him for this slight flaw, but I eventually accepted and loved him despite his shortcoming, LOL. We had our ups and downs, our times of extreme intimacy and our times of withdrawl from one another. Heck, we even had a TEENAGER! But here we still are, just starting to grey around the edges, just starting to fatten up around the mid-section. What really became the sure adhesive in our marriage ( besides the chocolate he faithfully supplies me with) was when I met and fell in love with another man.


Don't worry-- my husband encouraged the relationship. The other man was Jesus; a good part of any marriage--and the bridegroom I longed for. You know-- the omnipresent Rock of my Salvation?


I've heard it said that the search for God is an instinct we are born with. When I see the vows I wrote so long ago, and hear the longing for divine love found within a young girl's words . . . I can only think it must be true. I longed for God, and somehow knew the perfection of His love before I ever met Him.


And as for my husband? Well, he ain't perfect, but then he eventually pointed out that neither am I, so we're well suited to one another. Jesus said there is no marriage in heaven. But my husband and I signed on for FOREVER, so God will need to work something out. After all, a promise is a promise.


At least I know the next wedding feast will be fantastic! And the next bridegroom?


Divine.

Nancy, this was a nice read ! And it was very well written, but I expected as much, as you are a writter . Heck, I wonder how anyone can understand my hen scratchings. All I did most of my life was clean the manure and milk the cows and put crops up for the next following winter. Oh yes, and inbetween all of that , I did raise three children of a one and only woman of 38 years going on 39.

I believe that there is much to learn from your gifted writting and also from what you have said here. Commitment , even with all of its ups and downs, is worthy and rewarding. The next thing we can learn from this is that for most, if not all of us, from time to time we live in a fantacy world of our own. We tend to make something out of nothing, that goes way beyond reason. When we come back to reality, we then grasp within ourselves that even though our expectations are higher than the reality. Our expectations helps make this possible towards the reality that is within the real expectations.

Greater is he that is in us, than he that is in the world. I have high expectations, but as of yet, my expectations still need to be manifested into reality. Sometimes I actually set my standards too low, thus my expectations do not rise above my standards. I must set my expectations much higher than the standards I have set in the past.

Your expectations of your husband to be, became the reality of which you saw in him , because your expectations of him were high. If you only thought of him as a bum, your marraige would lack the zest and zeal that expectations come from. He was your prince and even God, in the sense that he could do all things. You expected much from him. And even though you found out that he has short comings. He was indeed the man you expected, because he is eternally still by your side.

Bless you

God has been so gracious to let us experience and know "His" own love in other people and I think that indeed, it is a reflection and an extention of God's own Love for us when he gives us people that truly love us...like a Father, like a Mother, or husband or wife, or sister or brother. God is all these and the love we may know from these, are all perspectives of His own Love for us. So this causes us to contemplate how we are displaying and giving the part that has been given to us to be and give to those who we are a reflection and extention of God's own love to.

[Dewayne]

That was Great! Nancy, your wedding vows remind me alot of some of David's writings, It makes me want to write a song out of them. Thanks for posting this! done me good to read this first thing this morning.

[Amadeus]

For fun, huh?

Thanks for sharing this with us, Nancy! It was beautiful! You undoubtedly were [and are] also a beautiful bride. Hopefully, all of us here will manage to be without spot or wrinkle or any such thing before The Bridegroom, Jesus!

Greetings Nancy,

I have found this thread to be quite inspiring and insightful, as others have.

Considering that we are one day away from what they call 'valentines day', when people do things for others as a way of saying those 'three simple words': "I love you." I have a question for you concerning 'wedding vows'. Would you consider it acceptable for a man to say 'three simple words' for a 'wedding vow'? If a man could only find it within himself to say 'three simple words' for his 'wedding vows', is that 'good enough' to marry him?

I'll await your answer, Josif

P.S. Did I mention those 'three simple words' are: "What's for dinner?"

P.S.S. Before you start lambasting me, let me remind you that in your own words this thread is 'just for fun'.

Originally Posted by Josif59

Greetings Nancy,

I have found this thread to be quite inspiring and insightful, as others have.

Considering that we are one day away from what they call 'valentines day', when people do things for others as a way of saying those 'three simple words': "I love you." I have a question for you concerning 'wedding vows'. Would you consider it acceptable for a man to say 'three simple words' for a 'wedding vow'? If a man could only find it within himself to say 'three simple words' for his 'wedding vows', is that 'good enough' to marry him?

I'll await your answer, Josif

P.S. Did I mention those 'three simple words' are: "What's for dinner?"

P.S.S. Before you start lambasting me, let me remind you that in your own words this thread is 'just for fun'.

Lumberjack!

That's bait and switch: Here I was thinking the three words were, of course, "I love you." Images of a handsome young hero before his lovely chosen one, she understanding by the depth of love shown in the windows to his soul, all he can not say--because he is a man of few words, but of deep and passionate depth, silent, but strong and the very essense of masculine passion. And then he says, "What's for dinner?"

You stick with the lumber (hehehe) and I'll do the romance novels, okay?

Thanks for the smile, dear Joseph~
Nancy

Originally Posted by Redeemed

Lumberjack!
Greetings Nancy


That's bait and switch: Here I was thinking the three words were, of course, "I love you." Images of a handsome young hero before his lovely chosen one, she understanding by the depth of love shown in the windows to his soul, all he can not say--because he is a man of few words, but of deep and passionate depth, silent, but strong and the very essense of masculine passion. And then he says, "What's for dinner?"

The phrase 'bait and switch' never entered my mind; but all things considered I guess I have to fess up to such a thing.

You stick with the lumber (hehehe) and I'll do the romance novels, okay?

I'm trying to type the best I can with one hand. I took your 'advice' and picked up a 2x4 that was full of pitch so now I'm literally 'stuck with the lumber'.

And yes, I'll gladly let you continue to write the 'romance novels'. Considering that you have someone in your life , other than our Heavenly Father, that you can speak of in such 'enduring' ways. Last thing I need to do is remind you of how 'blessed' you are.

Thanks for the smile, dear Joseph~

Being a child of thee one true God is enough to make one 'smile'. If I did anything to cause you to go from 'smiling' to 'grinning' well.....thanks for putting up with my odd sense of humor. '
Nancy

Til another time and another 'thread', eh

[moreexcellentway]

Nancy,

No doubt (as DeWayne said), those expressions of love do resemble Davids' expressions of love. I started to think I was reading an unrecorded or forgotten section of the Song of Solomon (Song of Songs) that the fair maiden had kept to herself (what real difference is there?).

I've always been very strong and principled. Perhaps it is my pig-headed stubborn masculinity that has always prevented me from verbally expressing my unbridled sentiment for The Lord,...or perhaps it is the loss of sanity as I become crazed with obsession that I'm trying to avoid...

Acts 26:24
"Festus said with a loud voice, "Paul, you are mad".

I have often wondered why there is no marriage in God's afterlife heaven. Heaven starts on earth in the minds and hearts of all who love The Lord AND HIS WAYS. All of us 'spirit creations' (new creations) who exist INSIDE Jesus's body have no gender (in The Lord, marriage is only between a man and a woman)....

Galatians 3:28
"there is neither male nor female".

It is the SPIRIT creation that exists inside His body SPIRITUALLY (our physical body still experiences marriage, it is our 'Jesus life/spirit that has no gender, our PHYSICAL "self" is not what is inside of Jesus.....

Acts 17:28
"for 'In him we live and move and have our being'".

Many people will simply 'LIKE' The Lord and come to Him for spiritual healing, but those who can express such love as done here "DELIGHT" in The Lord and He will fill their present personal heaven with what would truly please them (marriage)....

Psalm 37:4
"Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart".

I could speak all day of The Lords' truth, but as soon as I begin to speak of my love for Him, I become a sobbing mess (I must beware of obsession/insanity). I wimper in weakness as He takes my breath away, and I can no longer read the computer screen (let alone think) because "rivers" of His spirit flow out through my eyes (the eyes are the windows to the heart and soul, are they not?).....

John 7:38
"He who believes in me, as the scripture has said, 'Out of his heart shall flow rivers of living water'".

To me, He is just as I imagine Him to be, my 'dream of dreams'.

Thank you for this thread, Nancy.