My opinion and experience of the different things I've seen in my days leads me to believe motivation by Love is far more effective than by fear. Positive Renforcement vs Negative Reenforcement.

I've seen reasonable men do unreasonable things out of fear, I've seen common men do uncommon things out of Love.

There are some that try to instill within you the fear of God and fear of yourself. Bull.........Be motivated by God's love not the fear of him, be motivated by the Love of yourself and Love for others, not the fear of yourself......No man should attempt to instill fear in anyone, that is not of love. The fear they create is sometimes easily desguised in clever words. A person can only fear him or herself if he/she submits to fear of another.

Blessings.
Shannon

[christkid777]

I have heard it said that fear is "anti faith". Yet fear is the prime motivation for many people's actions. Perhaps it is because to truly love takes time and will power. The feeling of love is one thing, the will to do the works of love is another.

[Linsinbigler]

Fear (reverent awe) of God and fear of punishment are two distinct things. Also, punishment for one's benefit and punishment for selfish reasons are also distinct.

If a young child goes to put his finger in a light socket, and the parents chastise him, the child is motivated by being punished/chastised, but it is for his own good. It is fear of punishment that motivates him until he is old enough to figure out that putting his finger in a light socket is bad for him, and then to figure out that the punishment of the parent was solely for his benefit--out of love, to protect him from himself until he was old enough to figure it out for himself. We as Christians are told to move "beyond milk to solid food." We are to not be motivated by the lower things, but by the higher. Sin is bad not because God will punish us for it, but because it is bad for us, it leads to death and separation from God and also leads us away from our whole selves to withered nothingness. God gave His commandments is not for his own arbitrary personal satifaction. God wants us to stay away from sin for the same reason why a parent makes a rule not to put a finger in a light socket--one way leads to life, the other to death. The sooner we realize His motivation--our benefit--"for the life of the world"--then we can cast out our childish fears and have a relationship with our Creator, to invite Him to abide in us, and for us to abide in Him. "What is man that You are mindful of him?" And yet He is mindful of us, and more than mindful--he wants us not only to have subsistance but to have life and joy, and not only joy, but "that our joy be full." And thus we approach with a reverent awe such a one who is motivated beyond our understanding toward our ultimate good out of His immense love for us.

Originally Posted by Linsinbigler

Fear (reverent awe) of God and fear of punishment are two distinct things. Also, punishment for one's benefit and punishment for selfish reasons are also distinct.

If a young child goes to put his finger in a light socket, and the parents chastise him, the child is motivated by being punished/chastised, but it is for his own good. It is fear of punishment that motivates him until he is old enough to figure out that putting his finger in a light socket is bad for him, and then to figure out that the punishment of the parent was solely for his benefit--out of love, to protect him from himself until he was old enough to figure it out for himself. We as Christians are told to move "beyond milk to solid food." We are to not be motivated by the lower things, but by the higher. Sin is bad not because God will punish us for it, but because it is bad for us, it leads to death and separation from God and also leads us away from our whole selves to withered nothingness. God gave His commandments is not for his own arbitrary personal satifaction. God wants us to stay away from sin for the same reason why a parent makes a rule not to put a finger in a light socket--one way leads to life, the other to death. The sooner we realize His motivation--our benefit--"for the life of the world"--then we can cast out our childish fears and have a relationship with our Creator, to invite Him to abide in us, and for us to abide in Him. "What is man that You are mindful of him?" And yet He is mindful of us, and more than mindful--he wants us not only to have subsistance but to have life and joy, and not only joy, but "that our joy be full." And thus we approach with a reverent awe such a one who is motivated beyond our understanding toward our ultimate good out of His immense love for us.

I agree with all said, I guess the point I'm trying to make is relying solely on negative reenforcement can lead to rebelliousness or actually push someone away. Christ used positive reenforcement, as did the Apostles. Christ and the apostles picked people up, he didn't tear them down.

For example, I don't tell a driver learning to race that if he misses his brake zone and then misses the apex of a particular corner, he's going to hit the wall, tear up the car, and possibly kill himself. This instills fear, punitive, so much so he/she is concentrating soley on not getting hurt. I explain the positives, the reward, of braking at the correct point, making the proper apex, positive/reward=better car control and quicker lap times.

[NotFinishedYet]

Originally Posted by RollingThunder

I agree with all said, I guess the point I'm trying to make is relying solely on negative reenforcement can lead to rebelliousness or actually push someone away. Christ used positive reenforcement, as did the Apostles. Christ and the apostles picked people up, he didn't tear them down.

For example, I don't tell a driver learning to race that if he misses his brake zone and then misses the apex of a particular corner, he's going to hit the wall, tear up the car, and possibly kill himself. This instills fear, punitive, so much so he/she is concentrating soley on not getting hurt. I explain the positives, the reward, of braking at the correct point, making the proper apex, positive/reward=better car control and quicker lap times.

CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE

Dorothy Law Nolte

If a child lives with criticism,
he learns to condemn.

If a child lives with hostility,
he learns to fight.

If a child lives with fear,
he learns to be apprehensive.

If a child lives with pity,
he learns to feel sorry for himself.

If a child lives with ridicule,
he learns to be shy.

If a child lives with jealousy,
he learns what envy is.

If a child lives with shame,
he learns to feel guilty.

If a child lives with encouragement,
he learns to be confident.

If a child lives with tolerance,
he learns to be patient.

If a child lives with praise,
he learns to be appreciative.

If a child lives with acceptance,
he learns to love.

If a child lives with approval,
he learns to like himself.

If a child lives with recognition,
he learns that it is good to have a goal.

If a child lives with sharing,
he learns about generosity.

If a child lives with honesty and fairness,
he learns what truth and justice are.

If a child lives with security,
he learns to have faith in himself and in those about him.

If a child lives with friendliness,
he learns that the world is a nice place in which to live.

If you live with serenity,
your child will live with peace of mind.

With what is your child living?

[Soulheart3]

Originally Posted by RollingThunder

My opinion and experience of the different things I've seen in my days leads me to believe motivation by Love is far more effective than by fear. Positive Renforcement vs Negative Reenforcement.

I've seen reasonable men do unreasonable things out of fear, I've seen common men do uncommon things out of Love.

There are some that try to instill within you the fear of God and fear of yourself. Bull.........Be motivated by God's love not the fear of him, be motivated by the Love of yourself and Love for others, not the fear of yourself......No man should attempt to instill fear in anyone, that is not of love. The fear they create is sometimes easily desguised in clever words. A person can only fear him or herself if he/she submits to fear of another.

Blessings.
Shannon

I have seen that fear often does make unbelievers seek the Lord, out of the fear of retribution for a life of sin, but IMO once we have become a christian, only Love can bring us into the closer union with the Lord that any healthy minded christian desires.

-Brad

Some are saved by love, some by fear, and some by fire...The fear of death, hell, and the grace does work to inspire and compel sometimes and in some more than others..

But I am understanding the original point...it's always been the Love of God that has compelled and drawn me and caused change in me more than anything else. I have agreed with what you say about how condemnation can be destructive...it can cause bitterness rather than repentance...I've always felt "so" much that way too!

I thought this was a wise word I heard once....To the hurting or poor of humble preach Grace, and to the prideful, preach the Law...because the preaching of the Law the meek who are "willing," can be very hurtful and not saving, and preaching Grace to pride can be like casting your pearls before swine...the Law is designed to break pride...to show man the sin he cannot see that he has, and humble him, so that he is able then to recognize his need.

[CI]

Opening post by RollingThunder is perfect. No other commandment of God is greater than the love of God.

God so {in this way} love the world {of sinners} that He sent His only begotten Son. Grace that saves came by the Son of God.

God did not induce fear {that frightens} in the world of sinners in order to save them. Rather, He loved them.

With the love of God is the power of God. That is why love shall cover the multitude of sin. Fear {that frightens} does not cover the multitude of sins.

The fear of God is given by God to the believer. A reverent/adoring recipient who walks in the fear of God is without desolation, destruction, anguish, or stress... even in the wilderness leading to the salvation of God.

That is how a saint knows he/she has and is walking in the fear of God.


----
Grace and peace from God and His Christ unto all!

It is love which has always drawn me. I believe we can at times speak the truth in love but it is how it is done. I've always had difficulty with the picture many have painted of God being a cold, fire breathing God. Does this mean I think we should not fear him? no. What I believe is that my love for Him is so great that I fear what I do will hurt Him. Love is God's way whether it is soft or tough love it is love as depicted below.

1 Corinthians 13:1-7
1 Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. 2 And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned,[a] but have not love, it profits me nothing.
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

[Amadeus]

I believe that ultimately our walk with God must be based on love for Him. Fear of things other than God as LB described may play some part, but they cannot bring us home!